I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
