Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize
