oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Alive.
So much puke
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
