idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Randomize
