i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
