im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
