we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Just invented taco cereal.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
