best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
