I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
i dont even know how to be here
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
