Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
