East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize