let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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