Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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