I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
