Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
