one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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