let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
