I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
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