They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
