Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
