Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
