So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Just high enough for therapy.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
