The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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