please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
dude i'm inner monologue high
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize