Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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