You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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