PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
