either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
it was like his penis was on wheels.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
