Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
