My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
