She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Randomize
