I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
