i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
