I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
