Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
