ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
