we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize