I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
