ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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