Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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