but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
