This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
