I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
