She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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