Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
