It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
it's great music for shaving your balls
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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