nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
This gyro tastes like lonliness
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
