if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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