This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
