Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
